Last updated on March 26th, 2021.
Spring is the season to uproot weeds and plant new seeds so you can reap a beautiful harvest in the coming months.
Your life is just like a garden and follows the same universal principles.
Therefore: now is the perfect time to prune unwanted conditions so you can bloom and lead a more fulfilling life!
If you’re tired of feeling like a hamster on a wheel trapped in a glitzy life that looks great on paper but sucks the soul out of you, here are 3 habits to consider spring cleaning so you can be more fulfilled.
[bctt tweet=”Done feeling like a hamster stuck on a (golden) wheel? Then, spring-clean your life to be more fulfilled!”]
1. Pretending things are fine.
Being positive is a valuable trait which makes life more enjoyable: it helps you see the bright side of any given situation and brings a certain enjoyable quality to life.
Unfortunately, when it’s paired with stubborness and the refusal to look at facts, it can also become a concerning sabotaging pattern.
The positive friend.
We have all been in this situation when a friend falls for a complete loser where we’re left wondering what she can possibly find in him.
When we try to raise the topic with her she invariably lists all his qualities, talks at length about his potential but she strangely has a knack for carefully ignoring the big elephant in the room: he’s a complete jerk to her, he’s unfaithful, he’s an idiot, a complete dud…
She’s in love with an idealized vision of him (often also with a certain romanticism sainthood in bringing this potential out of him).
She’s not dealing with facts.
And, what happens is predictable…
Most of the time, she’s heart-broken, hurt, angry, confused about his behavior.
It’s a litany of: ‘ but he should…’, ‘why doesn’t he… ‘, ‘I am doing so much, I don’t understand why he ..’, ‘I have to keep seeing the good in him’.
What she misses is that sometimes seeing the good in someone (or in a situation) is getting the message that they are not good for you!
[bctt tweet=”Sometimes seeing the good in a situation means acknowledging that it is not good for you!”]
Could this also be you?
You may not be in love with a dud, but:
– Are you stuck in a career you loathe but you stick with it because it’s prestigious?
(Lawyers, I am talking to you!)
– Are you constantly at odds with your company’s culture but still hoping the next promotion or raise will improve things?
You get the message.
Sweet-talking yourself about all the perks, the advantages and the potentials of a given situation and ignoring its downside simply doesn’t work.
It keeps the golden shackles on…
… And it leaves you unfulfilled!
You must make a balanced assessment and evaluate if the efforts you put in are actually proportionate with the benefits you’re reaping.
If your contributions exceeds your retribution, it’s time to consider dumping the dud!
Would you invest in a stock that was constantly and steadily dropping below its buying price?
No, you would sell it before losing all your money.
Same logic applies here!
[bctt tweet=”If your contributions exceeds your retribution, it’s time to cut your losses!”]
Spring cleaning tip:
Staying in unhappy or unhealthy situations is the fastest way to suck the joy out of your life. Positivity shouldn’t blind you to the facts.
If you suspect you have a dud in you life, here’s a simple process:
– Take a piece of paper and make 2 columns.
– On one side list the positive aspects; on the other, list the negative ones.
– If the negative list far exceeds the positive one, you know what to do…
2.Trying too hard to fit in.
Human beings are social animals. We need interactions with others for our emotional well-being.
At times it’s even a question of survival. Being in a group allows us to leverage everyone’s efforts to gain more security and to become much stronger as a whole.
It is no wonder that the need for social interactions is so strongly rooted in our psyche.
However, as with everything, there can be too much of a good thing.
That’s when you get imbalances.
When we become so concerned with acceptance from the group that we forget our own path, trouble rears its head.
And it shows up as the fear of being ridicule, the fear of being shamed, worry about being rejected and concerns about fitting in at any cost.
[bctt tweet=”Don’t be so obsessed fitting in that you forget to vet whether you’d like to fit in”]
The problem here is that we tend to get so absorbed with wanting to belong to a given group that we forget one crucial thing: we’re not vetting whether the group we’re so desperately trying to cling to is actually suitable for us in the first place!
Your circle needs to match your objectives.
If you’re headed towards the path of entrepreneurship and leaving your solid 6-figure career for an uncertain path, your die-hard corporate friends will probably question your sanity.
If you suddenly decide to quit a prestigious, jet-setting, high-flyer lifestyle to embrace a simple life in the country, your circle of peers may be tempted to stage an intervention.
That’s to be expected!
However, the fact that they express doubts, ridicule your choices or question your sanity should not affect you.
It should only tell you on thing: you need a new circle of peers that’s more aligned with your journey and more supportive of your path.
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”,
Jim Rohn
If you want to soar and feel more fulfilled, it’s important to constantly re-evaluate the quality of your social circle and to become immune to criticism from people who are not aligned with your personal objectives.
Spring cleaning tip:
Being loving and social doesn’t mean you should ignore your own needs.
– Take a piece of paper and on top of the page write down your main objective.
– Below make a list of the friends and acquaintances you spend the most time with.
– Next to their name write down ‘yes’ or ‘no’ according to whether or not there are aligned with your goal.
– Spend more time with the people who are aligned with your objective and less with those who aren’t.
It may sound harsh, but if your best friend was planning a ski vacation while you were planning a beach break, would you make the same plans, buy the same gear, board the same plane…?
There you go!
It doesn’t mean that you’ve stopped loving them. It simply means that right now you’re not exactly going in the same direction.
[bctt tweet=”If you want to soar you need to learn to let go. #springcleaning”]
3. Being addicted to working too hard.
Our judeo-christian influenced western civilization has put a high priority on hard work.
We’ve all been taught that struggling is the golden ticket to everything we desire and that hard work is what makes us worthy of our objectives.
You’ve probably heard the expression a million times: ‘no pain, no gain!’
Now, before I go further: I am not advocating for being a slacker.
However, sometimes this ‘No pain, no gain!’ principle is taken a little too far and applied with a certain lack of finesse. This leads to staying stuck in unnecessary hard-work and struggles that suck the joy out of life.
[bctt tweet=”Why the ‘No pain, no gain!’ mentality is keeping you stuck”]
There’s no medal for tough-cookie!
This is especially true for the strong, independent women who like to prove they can do everything as good as men and end up overwhelmed in the process.
Yes, you can carry your suitcase and your all your grocery like a big girl.
However, since your guy has bigger arms than you, enjoys doing things for you and keeps begging you to take it easy, how about you just let him do it for once!
And yes, you’re certainly smart enough to figure your way out of this maze of a file you’ve been working on for months. However, it doesn’t mean you should do it all by yourself.
When your friendly and supportive colleague who has noticed your gaunt zombie look from all the all-nighters you’ve been pulling offers a helping hand, don’t say: ‘Oh, don’t worry. I am fine’!
The correct answer is: ‘Thank you’!.
Don’t pass opportunities to lighten your burden. Eagerly embrace them!
To be more fulfilled (and less stressed!), you must improve the balance between what you enjoy and what drains you.
[bctt tweet=”To be more fulfilled try letting go of your addiction to hard work Try smart work instead. #careerwomen”]
Spring cleaning tip
– Make a list of the activities you do on a regular basis. Next to each activity add a + or a – sign, according to whether each activity drains or uplift you.
– Cut down on the activities with a – sign. And find ways to add more + activities to your list.
If you’d like take your spring cleaning up a few notches, this 21 day stress-free living challenge will give you tons of powerful, easy-to-implement, bite-sized tips and strategies to spring-clean your mindset, strengthen your boundaries, let go of what weights you down so you can get back in the sweet spot of your life.
If you’re an ambitious woman who feels that the demands of life are starting to take their toll on your balance, your well-being and your joy, this will give you a boost!
[bctt tweet=”Does your life need spring-cleaning? Find out now:”]
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