Last updated on March 16th, 2021
One thing strong women all suffer from at one point or another in their lives is the tough-cookie syndrome.
You know this voice that says:
– ‘I can do all by myself, I don’t need ask for help.’
– ‘No one can do it as well as I can anyway.’
-‘It’s ok, I can handle it. I am not going to bother anybody’.
Whatever the reason that makes us take on more than we can handle, one thing I notice is that for many women there’s a certain pride even in doing this, almost like wearing a badge of honor.
I really believe it’s great to be strong and independent except that it is also be the fastest to way to the super slow road to your dreams!
Here’s why:Does your tough-cookie attitude put you on the slow lane to success? Click To Tweet
The tough-cookie syndrome depletes you.
When you take on a heavy work load, you end up working long hours and you lack energy for anything else in your life. It can make you cranky, impatient and unpleasant to be around.
It puts stress on your relationships with your friends and family. And you feel like hell.
Soon enough if you keep this pace your health will start to fail and your productivity will decline.
Not a desirable result!
The tough-cookie syndrome gives you blinders.
You probably have noticed that the best solutions come to you from a place of joy, flow and abundance. If you’re feeling overworked, stressed-out and under pressure, your thoughts will only allow you to see ideas aligned with that energy.
That skirt you bought when you were in a bad mood? You never wear it because it makes you feel ugly.
The assistant you hired when you were stressed out? She flaked on you and made you lose even more time!
That’s because things tend go awire when you’re out of alignment with the flow of life.
You can only master so many fields.
I know your smarts make Einstein looks like a school boy but let’s face it even for a Superwoman like you it’s pretty impossible to become an expert in fitness, nutrition, motivation, marketing, accounting, law, medecine, engineering, programming, investing, gardening, cooking, banking all at the same time.
I mean there are only so many hours in the day…
And you can only read some many books, study so many courses and master so many topics at the same time!
Now, let’s imagine you wanted to launch a book: you could be an amazing writer but a poor designer and know nothing about the world of publishing.
If you did it all by yourself, you’d probably end up with amateur results (at best): a wonderful book, with a cover that looks like it was drawn by a 6 year old and a wonky marketing plan which would ensure that no one would ever get a chance to read you masterpiece.
Basically, you would end up with a hot mess that would create a lot of stress, end up being more expensive and time-consuming than necessary and won’t even deliver the results you’re after.
Big fail!Your tough-cookie attitude may be keeping your overwhelmed Click To Tweet
You will reach your goals in… the next lifetime.
To go further with this idea, imagine working on your book, starting a business, looking for love, moving country at the same time and insisting on doing all by yourself.
For each goal, there are mindsets to transform, new skills to acquire and lots of work to be done.
It would take years for you to reach all these goals by yourself!
Or you could get smart and leverage the skills of others to get there in a fraction of the time.
Once you open yourself to the idea of receiving help: you could meet the perfect designer for your cover, find a business coach who lays out the foundations for your new business or you, be introduced to a jet-setter who shares with you all the secrets to relocating to your dream location and work with a match maker to find your partner.
And, achieve all this and be set within 6 months!
The difference between the 2 options is only a matter of surrendering to the idea that life doesn’t need to be hard.
Let’s overcome the tough-cookie syndrome once and for all!
I believe the cult of the busy hard-worker is an unhealthy addiction. The question should revolve instead around what we put in our days.
A matter of quality over quantity.
In Rich dad, poor dad, Robert Kiyosaki talks about the differences of mindsets being wealthy people and middle class people. And one of the key differences he outlines is how the wealthy leverage their resources, time and energy to reach their goals easier and faster.
Personally, I love surrounding myself with very successful mentors and from my observation too the higher you go the more leveraged they become.
Their tops tricks:
– Delegating to focus on what is essential.
– Getting mentored to learn how things are done from the best instead of ‘half-assing’ it (pardon my French!).
– Getting coached to get accountabilty and get feedback on their blindsides.
Because even if they have to invest to get these results, they understand that in the end it saves them energy and time: invaluable resources that you can never gain back in life, some of the most precious resources you will ever have.
It also gives them more peace of mind to know that every aspect of their lives is handled by the best.Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of strength. Click To Tweet
How can you leverage those tips in your life?
If you reading this, I assume that your on a journey towards a more fulfilling life with less stress, more freedom, and more quality time for yourself.
- You may not be ready to hire a team of expert to run your entire life today, but you could start by using these ideas to update your life and put more value around the quality of your life.
- If you’re looking to cut down your stress and build better boundaries so you’re not always so overwhelmed, this challenge is for you.
- If you’re feeling depleted and exhausted, taking a retreat may just be the thing for you. Here are my best tips on taking a personal retreat to bring more balance to your life. (There’s also a bespoke option if you prefer).
- Lastly, if you’d like to free yourself from these sabotaging mindsets that weight on your life, I am here for you.
Just remember: you do not have to do it all by yourself!
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