One thing strong women all suffer from at one point or another in their lives is the tough cookie syndrome.
You know this voice that says:
‘I can do all by myself, I don’t need ask for help.’
‘No one can do it as good as I can anyway.’
‘It’s ok, I can handle it. I am not going to bother anybody’.
Whatever the reason that makes us take on more than we can handle, one thing I notice is that for many women there’s a certain pride even in doing this, almost like wearing a badge of honor.
I really believe it’s great to be strong and independent except that it can also be the fastest to way to get on the super slow road to your dreams!
IT DEPLETES YOU.
When you take on a heavy work load, you end up working long hours and you lack energy for anything else in your life. It can make you cranky, impatient and unpleasant to be around.
It puts stress on your relationships with your friends and family. And you feel like hell.
Soon enough if you keep this pace your health will start to fail and your productivity will decline.
Not a desirable result!
YOU HAVE BLINDERS ON
You probably have noticed that the best solutions come to you from a place of joy, flow and abundance. If you’re feeling overworked, stressed-out and under pressure, your thoughts will only allow you to see ideas aligned with that energy.
That skirt you bought when you were in a bad mood? You never wear it because it makes you look fat.
The assistant you hired when you were stressed out? She flaked on you and made you lose even more time!
YOU CAN ONLY MASTER SOME MANY FIELDS
I know your smarts make Einstein looks like a school boy but let’s face it even for a superwoman like you it’s pretty impossible to become an expert in fitness, nutrition, motivation, marketing, accounting, law, medecine, engineering, investment, gardening, raw food all at the same time.
I mean there are only so many hours in the day… And you can only read some many books, study so many courses and master so many topics at the same time.
Now let’s imagine you wanted to launch a book, you could be an amazing writer but a poor designer and know nothing about the world of publishing.
If you did it all by yourself, you’d probably end up with amateur results (at best): a wonderful book, with a cover that looks like it was drawn by a 6 year old and a wonky marketing plan which would ensure that no one would ever get a chance to read you master piece.
Basically a hot mess that would create a lot of stress, end up being more expensive and time-consuming than necessary and won’t deliver the results you’re after.
Another big fail!
YOU WILL REACH YOUR GOAL IN YOUR NEXT LIFE TIME
To go further with this idea, imagine working on your book, starting a business, looking for love, moving country at the same time and insisting on doing all by yourself. For each goal, there are mindsets to transform, new skills to acquire and lots of work to be done.
It would take years for you to reach those goals.
Or you could get smart and leverage the skills of others to get there in a fraction of the time.
Once you open yourself to the idea of receiving help: you could meet the perfect designer for your cover, find a business coach who lays for you the foundations for your new business, be introduced to a jet setter who shares with you all the secrets to relocate to your new desired location and work with a match maker to find your partner and be set within 6 months.
The difference between the 2 options is only a matter of surrendering to the idea that life doesn’t need to be hard.
LET’S END THE CULT OF THE TOUGH COOKIE
I believe the cult of the busy hard-worker is an unhealthy addiction. The question should revolve instead around what we put in our days.
A matter of quality over quantity.
In Rich dad, poor dad, Robert Kiyosaki talks about the differences of mindsets being wealthy people and middle class people. And one of the main difference he outlines is how the wealthy leverage their resources, time and energy to reach their goal easier and faster.
Personally, I love surrounding myself with very successful mentors and from my observation too the higher you go the more leveraged they become.
Their tops tricks:
– Delegating to focus on what is essential.
– Getting mentored to learn how it’s done from the best instead of half-assing it.
– Getting coached to get accountabilty and get feedback on their blindsides.
Because even if they have to invest to get these results, they understand that in the end it saves them energy and time: resources that you can never gain back in life, some of the most precious resources you will ever have.
It also gives them more peace of mind to know that every aspect of their lives is handled by the best.
If you reading this, I assume that your on a journey towards a more fulfilling life with less stress, more freedom, and more quality.
You may not be ready to hire a team of expert to run your entire life today, but how could you use these ideas to update your life and put more value around the quality of your life?
PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW AND SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE
Photo credit: CC- Beth Scupham / edited by S+B