Although you may not be a gazillionaire or have a star with your name on a pavement, you’re still leading what many would deem a rather successful life: you have a ‘good’ career, some modicum of material comfort, you’re one of the lucky ones.
Or so it seems…
Behind the successful front it’s another story. You feel lost, confused, overwhelmed and unfulfilled.
Your career might sound prestigious but the grueling schedule, the constant in-fighting and the ‘always-on’ culture is stressing the hell out of you. Not to mention the boring, meaningless work that makes you wonder if you’re not completely wasting your life! You’ve made quite a few sacrifices to get where you are and although it feels foolish (and impractical!) to throw it all away, you can’t see yourself going on like this.Successful but feeling lost in life? Here's what you can do: Click To Tweet
Are you over-reacting?
While you may feel like you’re dealing with a frivolous issue if you compare your situation with others less fortunate than you are, it doesn’t change how you feel.
If you feel lost in life and miserable, that’s problematic no matter how you look at it.
In these day and age we have access to too many resources on the effects of leading a frustrating, unfulfilling and stressful life to take your situation lightly. And, let’s not to even mention the mental health and drug abuse crisis amongst successful professionals…
I would not consider your situation frivolous in any way and neither would I recommend that you would.
Think about it this way: we all have different life stories, different life experiences, different stations in life but we all feel pain in the same way, whether physical or emotional. Doesn’t this tell you something?
Pain is a message from your inner self (or your body) letting you know that you are entering a danger zone. Why overlook this valuable message and keep forging down a path that’s clearly causing so much anguish and frustration?
Now, I certainly don’t believe that we should always thrive to remain in our comfort zone and seek the easier way at any cost, however when a path is so obviously giving you signs that it’s not for you, it’s probably wise to listen and take appropriate action.
It doesn’t make sense to continue moving forward in a direction that no longer work for you. When you’re lost on the road, you take a moment to figure out the directions towards where you are going, so it does make sense that when you’re lost in life you should do the same.
Now that this is out of the way, let’s quickly look at some key mistakes to avoid.
Do yourself a favor, do not do this:
Do not pretend everything is fine.
(No reason to make this the center of all your conversations either…)
The fastest way to get out of your bind and to find your sweet spot again is to own the situation you’re in, acknowledge that you’re lost in life and proceed from there. Do not lull yourself into believing things will work themselves out by themselves, do not minimize your feelings, do not feel foolish for how you feel, do not pretend things are great, take things in and make the necessary changes.
Do not take action for the sake of taking action.
This one is a bit of a pet-peeves of mine.
How often do I see women unhappy in their career decide that they need to switch company without taking a minute to consider the reason of their frustration? They just declare ‘I need a new job’ and proceed to look for a role without ever questioning the fact that it might be the career itself, the industry they are in or the lifestyle they lead that could be the culprit in this situation.
For example: if your a lawyer who can’t stand litigation, there’s no point in looking for a new position as a litigator…
You know what would happen a couple of years down the line if you did this: you’d be back to square one, feeling lost in life and miserable all over again.
Don’t let this happen to you!
You do not need to take action, you need to take the right action, at the right time after having clarified your new direction in life.
Anything else is a waste of time…
Do not panic or act out
This one is what is commonly refered to as the quarter-life or mid-life crisis. It’s the extreme variation of the previous point.
Nothing against Bali and yoga pants. It’s simply that these extreme knee-jerk reactions are often not the right solutions in this type situation. The fact that you’ve realized that you’ve ignored your spiritual side to build your successful career doesn’t mean that you were actually destined to become a yoga teacher all these years. It may simply mean that you needed to better balance your life to include more of this aspect of yourself.
Basically, take your time and digest your insights before making any radical change.
This is what I recommend you do instead:
I have put together this free mini-course together to help you. It’s broken down in short lessons that each give you a quick action step to help you shake things up, feel less lost in your life and regain energy, confidence and a sense of direction.
Here are the basic steps in a nutshell:
Creating mental space
No great insight has ever come from a state of confusion, that’s how I recommend starting with freeing your mind first.
Creating physical space
Soul-searching and life changes require time. Right now, everybody’s probably claiming center-stage in your life except yourself. To overcome this challenge you’re going to switch your focus towards yourself. I know, I know, you’re busy, but bear with me for a minute, this step really doesn’t have to take much time. Watch the video for all the details.
Between the stress inherent to your lifestyle and the concerns coming from your present situation, you’re probably feeling drained. Not the best place to tackle big changes! With this step, you’ll learn a quick and fun way to boost your energy level.
Reconnecting with yourself
After all these preliminary steps you should be in a better place to begin your soul-searching journey. There it’s important to start planning your future from the correct starting point: being clear on who you are and on what matters to you.
Understanding why you got lost
I am sure you will agree that you really could have done without this crisis you’re facing these days. Understanding why you got lost will help you identify the perfect solution for you and prevent you from re-creating a similar situation in the future.
To go further
If you have followed the steps outlined above, you should have begun to regain a sense of direction and to feel less lost in your life. That’s only the beginning however.
If you want your gains to last, you will need to make some fundamental changes. Depending on your situation, you might need:
There’s no cookie-cutter answer here. You are unique and the perfect answer for you will come from within you through some honest enquiry and soul-searching. Once you have regained clarity, you’ll be able to put together a plan of action to put your life back on track.
Now, I know you’re busy, stressed and quite overwhelmed. The last thing you’re dreaming of is probably to start all over again. Don’t worry, big life changes don’t have to mean lots of stress. Here’s an interesting case study of mine if you need inspiration on what’s possible.
For many reasons (divorce, financial crisis, …), I’ve had my share of life overhauls and over the years I have gathered a well-furnished toolbox to make quick, smooth, stress-free transitions that I am happy to share with you. You can check out these virtual workshops or if you feel you could benefit from a more bespoke solution feel free to schedule a complimentary consultation.
Feeling lost doesn’t have to mean wasting years getting your life back on track, with the right tools and strategies, things can be re-aligned in no time!
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